茶碗蒸

This morning was nothing less than an emotional roller-coaster for me.

When I rolled out of bed - all disorientated and weary-boned - I did not immediately click in with the reality. The scene behind my cheap green curtains were somewhat dreary, for a grey drizzle had settled over the city and the obvious wetness of the road kept me from picking jeans out of my wardrobe (since I am severly lacking fitting ones at the moment - they are all so long that they would just start soaking up the puddles on the footpath).

Breakfast followed in the usual relaxed manner - with the usual menu of two pieces of toast, a cup of diluted coffee and the usual entertainment of reading the daily local newspaper. Indeed, I took my time and did not return to my room until 8:30 or so... and continued my old routine of checking other people's blogs and signs of any long-anticipated updates in some online manga sites.

8:50am,  an e-mail alert from my recently-fixed MSN popped up on the computer screen.

I clicked it.

And my heart lurched in my ribcage as the words "dispensing exam results are out and will be posted up on the P2 noticeboard on 6th floor" sprang onto the screen, and registered within my brain.

...Dispensing marks!! TODAY!? ...Well I suppose the retest is next week so they must let us know before then.... I don't want to check it though!! B-But I guess I have to... Come on, face the reality! But what do I do if I failed!? Is it posted up now?? But it said it WILL be posted so that means it's not posted yet... but then when??? Are they trying to kill us? We need to know!!....

A train of incoherent thoughts rushed through my muddled mind as a burst of adrenaline exploded in my chest. Shivering, I decided 10 minutes should be enough for them to put the dreadful list of ID numbers up. So I allowed myself to fidget in my room for that long. Then, when I could sit still for no longer, I grabbed a jacket, scarf, and my keys - then bolted out of my room and straight through the Hayward doors into the crisp morning air.

It was raining still, and only then did I realize, in my desperate frenzy, I had forgotten to grab an umbrella on the way out. I pulled on my hood and made do with the little protection it provided. Anyway, I was not out in the open for long... since Adam's Building and Hayward were merely five minutes apart.

The ancient rickety elevator made me sicker than usual as it shuddered to a stop on 6th floor - and since the dim light in the elevator remained flashing on "5" - indicating 5th level, I did not actually realize I had reached my destination until I saw one of my fellow classmates hovering by the noticeboard.

Well, seems like I wasn't the only one anxious to know my results. But-

"It's not out yet," He informed me.

My heart sank, and the blood which had been pounding in my ears since I first laid my eyes on the announcement gave a final ferocious roar, then simmered out. Oh, please don't tell me I have to endure a whole morning of tingly nerves?

But right at that moment, dear Mr. Fraser - who took our dispensing labs - appeared through the doors leading from the stairs with a long list in his hands.

We gasped, and stood forzen in front of the elevator. It wasn't long for him to notice the two of us gaping at him - or more precisely at the piece of paper in his hand - with intense looks of silent terror, and hence realize who we must have been.

Stopping in his tracks, he turned the paper over so that we could see the list of 30 or so student ID numbers printed in a frightening bold font, and separated into two columns - each for a different stream of re-test times next week. My eyes darted through the numbers so rapidly that they hurt, and as I reached the bottom of the printed texts I almost fainted.

Fainted from relief.

For I did not spot my number among the collection... which means I had passed.

....I passed!!!

After I had double and triple checked the list, I finallly, finally felt the first comforting wave of relief wash over me. The first in two weeks.

Thank you God, for hearing my prayers these past two weeks. (Tears) And hopefully this will also signal the end of my frequent nightmares of dispensing these days (yeah it's sad I know lol).

My classmate was not so fortunate, however. And I heard Mr. Fraser informing him of the place and time when the exam papers would be revised and any error pointed out. Although I could scarcely register what he was saying since my brain had simply frizzled out from the huge disbelief. My ears were ringing, and I could not keep a hysteric grin from my face.

Well, that's one nightmare over, at least.

And perhaps I should really follow Mr Fraser's advice to me as I stumbled back into the elevator.

"Now you should go and have a large cup of coffee or tea!"

Yes, of course now that I have well and truly passed, I can say that this may be a memory all pharmacy students would be laughing over in a few years time. For if anyone else had happened to walk into our lecture room this morning, they would probably have mistaken it for a wedding feast of some sort. People hugging, girls squealing, looks  of true relief, joy and wonder... These will, no doubt, all be part of the unforgettable memories worth looking back on (not that we could ever forget it even if it wasn't worth looking back on) when we venture out into the world as future pharmacists.